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They met and fell in love in a time when traditional gender roles were rigidly observed.
Back then ‘dating’ was known as ‘courting’, parental approval was a must, and letter writing was a sure-fire way to win a lady’s heart.
It might sound like hard work to some.
But five decades later, Reside Communities’ Golden Wedding Couples are still going strong, with a lifetime of relationship experience that the younger generations can only dream of.
To celebrate Valentine’s Day, our residents have put together a list of ‘dos and don’ts’ to help teach millennials and Gen Z ers a thing or two about first-date etiquette and the secrets to everlasting love.
Part of the “silent generation” – born between 1928 and 1945 – this demographic is best known for its traditional values.
Happy Valentine’s Day from our ‘golden couples’!
Eris and Russell Platt – Samford Grove
The couple have two daughters and have been married 52 years, after meeting and falling in love while working as public servants. Russell had just come out of the Army following National Service, and was on the front counter at the Department of Finance. Eris worked at the Department of Interior.
They often advise their grandchildren – Clary, 17, Hazel, 15, and Maggie, 13 – on how to best present themselves on the dating scene.
“I tell the girls to be ladylike and respectful of themselves and to watch what they’re wearing because it gives the wrong impression,” said Eris, 74.
“Unfortunately, I think social media is spoiling the whole dating game.
“Young people today have no privacy because everything is on the internet, and I feel sorry for them. I feel as though chivalry has been lost now.”
Russell, 79, believes youngsters need to put their phones down and treat women with respect.
“It frightens me because I think how it would have been back in our day if everyone had a phone in their pocket to take a picture all the time – it stifles people from being their authentic selves,” he said.
“When I first met Eris she was an absolutely beautiful lady and I told her so. I asked her out in 1968 and we went with a group of friends to a ball at Cloudland.
“Unfortunately, you can’t seem to go up to a woman today and tell her she looks beautiful because next thing you know you’re accused of belittling them or worse.
“I’ve said to Clary, if you take a girl out you have to respect her and look after her – don’t try to be a smarty pants and get drunk and make a fool of her.”
For the Platts, the secrets to a happy marriage include trust, laughter and the ability to move on from an argument rather than holding a grudge.
“Sometimes you just have to suck it up and move on,” said Eris.
Russell agrees.
“We just get over stuff,” he said.
“Trust your partner, be happy, do not take yourself seriously. From the day we were married, music was always played at our house and it still is. We still go to see bands and sing songs.
“We also have a few glasses of wine together most nights. Someone once told me he had observed that couples who drink together stay together so that must be it!”
Judith and Lyle Bird – Brookland Robertson
The couple, who moved to Brookland on November 27, 2024, have been married 65 years and have two daughters, eight grandchildren and 15 great-grandchildren.
They met outside Judy’s family-owned service station in Rockhampton following a motorbike accident during which Lyle says he “literally fell for Judith”.
“My mum sent me out for half a kilo of tomatoes,” said Lyle.
“I had them balanced on the motorbike when I saw a pair of legs and slightly elevated shoes, which led to some short yellow shorts. Next thing I knew I had crashed into a car which didn’t give me the right of way. Luckily it was only my pride that was damaged.”
The pair started dating soon afterwards and were married on January 2, 1960.
Now aged 87, the couple say they have never had an argument, and believe young people today need to work harder when it comes to relationships.
“Young people today don’t put the same effort into their relationships as they used to,” said Judith.
“They give up too early and get a divorce, which is a real shame for them.
“I used to go dancing every night of the week. People are on their phones now and don’t bother dancing. They are involved with their phone rather than real life.”
Lyle, a former primary school teacher, added: “I consider arguing to be a waste of time and effort, which is why we’ve never argued. I would advise young men to learn to say yes and no in the
right places very early on. They will make a mistake, but they need to just roll with it, and don’t ever say, ‘I told you so.’”
Jenny and Trevor Mahony – Fairway Carindale
The couple met on the school bus and have been married 57 years, with four children and seven grandchildren to show for it.
Four months into their relationship Trevor was sent to Cunnamulla with National Australia Bank and Jenny stayed in Warwick where she worked at a pharmacy – 700kms away.
In an age before mobile phones and the internet, the couple relied on letter writing to keep their romance alive. Two years later they were engaged and 14 months after that they were married.
Jenny said today’s couples need to work harder on their relationships.
“Marriage today doesn’t appear to have the same commitment,” she said.
“The most important thing for us has been love, trust and communication. We have also made many sacrifices over the years, and feel a successful marriage requires a lot of give and take.
“Our generation was prepared to accept that you walked before you ran.”
Trevor believes men don’t have the same respect for women that they had when he was younger.
“They don’t make an effort to dress nicely either,” he said.
“Sloppy clothes that aren’t ironed are not the way to impress a lady. In my day, you couldn’t even step outside the office without putting on your suit coat. There is no discipline anymore.”
In a nutshell…
